This post is going to be more of a freestyle rambling format. I don’t do posts like this often, so let me know in the comments what you think of them. If you like em, I can do more in the future.
So I was traveling today, a lot of which involved train and subway riding, and to pass the time I wrote a poem. This evening, I cleaned the poem up and am pretty satisfied with the result. I would have posted it today, but something pulled me back from doing so. The poem just felt too raw and exposed. Too relevant and personal. Given the public nature of this blog, I have become wary of posting poetry that is too vulnerable. And honestly, that wariness disappoints me. I started the blog as an attempt to share my writing with others, and open parts of myself that I wouldn’t ordinarily share with other people. Poetry writing in the past was literally like writing diary entries for me, and I am sure many other writers out there can relate to that feeling. The feeling of vulnerability when sharing a poem that is close to home. A poem that isn’t just about a vague conception, or made up story. But one that really shows what’s gnawing at the writer’s heart.
I was better at sharing when I first started my blog last summer. For whatever reason, I’ve become worse at it recently. In fact, my degree of openness fluctuates sometimes. I can be good about opening my life up to others at one time span, and then crappy about it in another. I don’t think there is a right or wrong about the degree of sharing when it comes to blogs or any social media medium be it Youtube videos, instagram, facebook. But I do think that one grows when stepping out of one’s comfort zone. And that a higher degree of openness means greater connection with your readers– that’s the nature of relationships. No one can connect with some machine, or some face of perfection. We all like to see imperfection in people because it makes them human. It makes them relatable. I am a bit disappointed in myself for being unable to share this poem at the moment. I think it all ties down to my recent tendency to guard my feelings and keep them to myself. But at least this post in itself is me being more open, right? That has to count for something 😉
So instead of posting the poem, I have decided to make this an open discussion about vulnerability, exposure, and “way too raw” writing. Do you guys have certain pieces that you kinda wish you could share with others, but are hesitant to because it means making yourself uncomfortably vulnerable? If you ended up sharing it, did you feel relieved afterward? If you didn’t, did you end up sharing it later, or simply tucked it away for personal reflection?
And, would you guys be interested in reading the poem at some point in the near future? Of course, leave whatever comments you feel like. And check out my other stuff if interested 🙂